This post is inspired by one of my own journal writings. I struggle with my own identity and self-esteem A LOT, as I’m sure we all do. I always longed to be more beautiful/smart/funny or any other thing that makes us conform to the socially accepted ideals of beauty. It’s been a prayer ever since I started puberty. So recently, I was going through that time again, where I felt crazy insecure again.
A few months back, when I went through this period before (its a thing that happens every so often), I wrote in my journal about it. I did a mindmap of all the things I am in Christ. Because that reminder is needed WHENEVER we feel insecure. I began to list out all the things, God calls me in His word.
Here’s some of this list, He calls me:
A MASTERPIECE – Ephesians 2:10
ADOPTED DAUGHTER – Romans 8:15
MORE THAN A CONQUEROR – Romans 8:37
CHILD OF GOD – 1 John 3:1
GOD’S OWN POSSESSION – 1 Peter 2:9
WHOLE IN CHRIST – Colossians 2:10
FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY MADE – Psalm 139:14
My favourite one would be fearfully and wonderfully made from Psalm 139. But reading this psalm back made me realise something very essential in gaining confidence in yourself…
You can only know and be confident in who you are, if you know your creator. The more you get to know your creator and delight in Him, the more you know yourself since He was the one that created you, lovingly with His own hands (Isaiah 64:8). The more you know about the nature of God, the more you can feel confident in yourself and how He created you.
To have God-breathed confidence, you need to have a God-breathed revelation of who HE is.
Unfortunately, it’s not about us and it has never been about us.
Psalm 139 talks about the greatness of God. Verses 1 to 6 talk about how omniscient God is, how He knows EVERYTHING from our movements to even what we are about to say! Verses 7 to 12 discusses the omnipresence of God. God is EVERYWHERE and we can’t hide from Him. God is sovereign in His nature. Verses 13 and 14 come after declaring God’s nature. Verses 13 and 14 says (ESV), “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”
Fearfully, in the Hebrew, means ‘to cause astonishment and awe’ or ‘to inspire reverence or godly fear or awe’. Whilst, wonderfully, in the Hebrew, means ‘to be distinct, marked out, be separated, be distinguished’. We were created to cause awe and be distinct. No person is the same because we weren’t created to be the same. We were created uniquely – each with our perceived flaws and quirks.
David (who wrote this psalm) KNEW His creator, he knew the nature of God. He knew that God knows everything, is everywhere and is sooo great beyond our understanding. Because of this information, David could confidently say that I AM fearfully and wonderfully made. David affirmed his confidence in God by saying “my soul knows it very well.” We can join David in saying I AM fearfully and wonderfully made as well. But not because of our looks or intellect, but because of who God is at His very nature.
We need to grasp the nature of God so much so that our own soul’s can know it very well. We need to take in the greatness and sovereignty of God. We need to take in the majesty and splendour of the King and never lose the awe and wonder of who He is. Because then we can confidently state our identity as we know who and whom’s we are.
God-breathed confidence in ourselves start with confidence in our God.